A Sucky Parenting Day

**I wrote this post a year ago, before officially starting the blog. But the feels I get while rereading it are still VERY relevant to my life right now**
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Today was a fail. And it started off so strong which makes the fail hurt even more.

We started the day with pancakes for breakfast and quickly got out the door to meet some friends to go to a free local farm/zoo thing. It has a few cows, goats, chickens, bunnies, pigs and ducks and while it’s definitely not hours of fun, it was a gorgeous morning and we got there before a huge surge of people came later in the morning. Everyone was well behaved, listened (for the most part) and I got to have an actual conversation with one of my best mom friends and it just felt so. good. 

After the farm, we walked up a hill to the park. A new park for my kids that included a metal fire truck which instantly brought me back to visiting my grandma and grandpa in Chicago and the park that was just down the street from their house. When I saw R enjoying it my heart almost burst.

So M is walking around, L is climbing on this rock thing, R is loving the fire truck and E…well E is on the playground but walking slowly. I ain’t stupid. I know she peed in her underwear (oh, I forgot to mention, we are knee deep in potty training with very inconsistent success) so I ask her to come over to me. I’m planning my strategy as she comes over – I have a size 5 diaper in the diaper bag and I can just slip the underwear off, put the diaper on and throw the wet underwear into the bottom of the stroller for now. When she gets closer she begins to whine a bit which leads me to feel at the back of the underwear where, yep, I discover she NOT ONLY peed but also pooped. In her underwear. While we were in public. 

This is the SECOND time in 3 days that she’s pooped in her underwear and I wasn’t prepared for it the first time (although I had our own bathroom to change her) and I definitely was not prepared for it when it happened at the freaking park. So M, E and I head over to the stroller and I just thank my lucky stars that I am with a rockstar mom who just knows I need help and she watches L and R. Upon getting to the stroller, E has now decided this underwear must come off. So I lay her down and try to come up with a game plan but that was pointless. She pretty much takes it off herself and I am left with dirty underwear, poop on the grass, poop on my hands, a crying 2 year old and a curious 1 year old who must see what is happening. 

I cannot do this. I am saying every curse word I know in my head praying none of them slip and are said out-loud (they aren’t) and I just wipe and wipe and wipe until she is clean enough to finish the playdate. And since we are at the park, I can only use wipes to clean my own hands so I basically want to vomit everywhere. After another 10 minutes or so we decided to leave, say goodbye to our friends and head home…where now I am tasked with making sure E is actually cleaned up, make lunch but first wash my hands 7 times. 

I was a terrible mom in the hour and a half between the time we got home and nap time. I thought nap time would help me calm down (a little snack and How I Met Your Mother season 1) but L and R came down 4, yes FOUR, times for various reasons which made it less relaxing. 

STILL determined to turn the day around, I decided we would go outside. If we got outside at 4, it would just be a little less than an hour and a half until Andre got home and he could take over. I got the two youngest in their swim diapers, filled the water table, set up the sprinkler and sat down, only to get about 30 minutes through our outside time before R wanted to go inside, M wanted in but also out of the Little Tikes car, L wanted to change her clothes after getting them soaked (she was told we were using the sprinkler!!!) and E screamed/cried every time a fly or something reminiscent of a fly, came near her. 

So with just 20 minutes until Andre would be home and save me from this chaos, we had to pack things up and go inside where I got swim diapers off and helped peel off wet clothes. Which leads me to this post. I tried to get it together to spend this time with my kids and my husband but luckily Andre knew I needed a break and told me to take one and this is what I am doing with it. Writing down the details of our, what should have been great but turned to literal crap, day so I can later remember the things I learned: some days just suck. There’s no sense in trying to enjoy it right now because besides actual adult conversation earlier in the day, it was no fun at all.
Do all days suck, nope. Do some…